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Monday
Sep252017

Mums and Dads gone wild

I love watching people at concerts and events having a good time.  I wonder where they’re from, what their life is like and imagine that the event is a real chance for them to escape their day to day hum drum.   I especially love watching older people let loose.

Unless they’re at a Tina Arena concert and being annoying.   That shits me.

I love Tina Arena.  She’s one of those women who has had a great career, fought back the haters and found herself.  I love people like that.  Ones who stare in the face of haters and say “Jam it” … or something a little harsher. 

I was excited to be seeing her sing her hits at the Plenary – a small intimate venue.  A great night out with work friends after a big week at work. Except a whole lot of Mums and Dads tried to ruin my good night out.

It started when we sat down.  A nice buzz in the room.  People looking forward to seeing Tina and hearing her music.  We waited.  The room filled up.  The lights went down.  The show started.

A guy to our left yelled, “Hurry up Tina, you’re seven minutes late”.  What a bogan.  A few people giggled.   An artistic looking man in a hat in front of me retaliated loudly, “Don’t worry Tina, you come out when you want”.  Oh God, we’re going to have a Tina Turf War.

After a video montage of her career highlights Tina hit the stage belting out “McArthur Park”.  Wow.  Amazing. Spine tingling. Stunning. We clapped feverishly.  

“I love you Tiiiiiinnnnnnnnaaaa!” yelled a woman from the front of the room.

Tina smiled and said thank you.  As all good, professional, I’ve got my shit together performers do.   She then went on to tell a story about the next song.

“Tiiiinnnaaa!  We love youuuuuu!”, yelled a guy from the back.

A guy from who knows where started wolf whistling.  Mate, we’re not at the strippers.  

How long is this shit going to go on for?  Let Tina tell her story and sing a song.

Over and over,  this went on between every track.   People from all over the venue yelling about their love and adoration for Tina.  I love her too.  I just don’t need to scream my lungs out about it.

The crowd finally settled and the lights dimmed.  Tina started to sing Heaven Help My Heart, a personal favourite.  It wasn’t the usual upbeat poppy version I was used to, but a more mellow style.  I loved it anyway.  I sang along gently - not too loud to freak out the people around me – that’s called concert etiquette.

The woman in front of me fidgeted.  She pulled her phone out of her bag, unlocked it and started texting.  Then she put it back in her bag and stared at the stage.  One minute later, her phone was on her lap again while she responded to more messages.  This went on and on for three songs.  I tried hard to ignore her, however the light of her phone was so bright, she could have used it for a spotlight on the stage.

Finally I couldn’t stand it anymore and leaned over, tapping her on the shoulder.  “Excuse me, but your phone is really bright. Can you please turn it down?”  She looked embarrassed and quickly put her phone away.  The people in our row smiled appreciatively.

For the rest of the set, I watched her tapping her knee, desperate to check her messages.  Be in the moment lady, I thought. 

Tina continued to sing her hits, chatting to the crowd in between each track.  Unfortunately a bunch of fans who don’t know the difference between a footy match and a concert, continued to yell out their love for Tina during brief moments of silence.  

Before she left the stage, Tina thanked everyone for sharing such a special experience with her and for not being stuck on their phones “texting their boyfriends at home” like teenagers.  The woman in front looked at me sheepishly so I gave her my best PR smile.   Even Mums and Dads get FOMO too it seems.  Also, good on her for having a boyfriend who sends her teddy bears and love heart emojis.  There might just be hope for me yet.     

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