About Crazy Tan
Weird and funny shit happens to me a lot. Some of it I create, most of it, I attract.
I do dumb and fun stuff like online dating, running marathons, throwing pop up parties and drinking too much champagne.
My life is freaking hilarious.
Who are all these people?
GFM - My Gay FlatMate. An amazing guy who I love and adore. He feeds Asha the cat, washes the dishes and picks me up when I'm drunk. My running buddy. If gay marriage was legal, I'd propose tomorrow.
Super Girl. A brilliant friend who is super strong, super tough and tells it like it is. We buy organic food and green juice that tastes like cut grass together - or overdose on Japanese. She's my rock (hard).
Speccy Beccy. Another bestie. We live parallel lives. She knows when I'm upset, happy or out of control even though she lives interstate. Fun, smart, energetic and there when I need her. We can talk forever. I miss her.
Shelley Belly. My bestest most amazing friend. Brave, super smart, an activist making the world a better place. She knows my secrets, has seen my best and worst and came to see me run the New York marathon. Love her.
Skinny Bitch. A great chick and friend. We work together, do personal training together and have fun together. A PR Queen. She needs to eat something. Just not with her hands. That freaks her out.
Soccer God. One of my favourite boys. He knows when I'm stressed, bringing me muffins, coffee and chocolate when I need it. He motivates me to run and seize life with one hand. Mr High Achiever.
Sports Buddy. The one that never was. He taught me about sport, how to spend whole weekends on a couch and dance like no one's watching. Long, wine filled lunches are our speciality.
PDH. The world's best, sexiest, funkiest barista. This boy's smile will make your day. His espresso martinis will make your night. His lock ins kick started my party phase. One day, he'll be a famous rapper.
Jet Girl. An amazing chick who always makes me feel really good after we catch up. She has two crazy kids who drop one liners like comedians. She inspires, motivates and makes me laugh. A brilliant friend.
Pirate Girl. An amazing chick who loves pirates, footy, sport and a good time. We console each other over stupid men and do lots of Vinyassar yoga together. She downward dogs like no other person I know.
Joker Girl. A newbie comedian, her laugh is louder and crazier than mine. Super generous, funny and the queen of social media, hanging out with her is always fun. I run late to drive her mad.
Twin Kat. A crazy Greek girl born on the same day as me - just a few year later. She gives me tough love, baklava and a lot of laughs. We torture ourselves by seeing foreign films that make no sense.
Champagne Kezza. So called because she loves champagne - and it brings out her wild side. Married to the sweetest man on earth, Kezza is the first one to step in and help if you need it. Or come to your party.
Ghetto Girl. My office stalker. This girl is funny, sassy and sings like a black soul singer. She dances like Beyonce. She may be small but she's a bucket of fun. One day she'll have her own TV show.
PT Dani. My awesome personal trainer who I may or may not have a girl crush on. She was in the military and has been to Afghanistan so training me is a piece of cake for her. Funny, smart and tolerant.
Ex Hubby. My ex husband (see what I did there?). We're great friends and I adore him, we're just not meant to be married. He's supportive and there if I need him, even though he lives overseas.
Merman. A self confessed manwhore. A party boy. Always exceptionally well dressed with something fun going on. if he could be Ariel the mermaid he would.
Girl with a Boys Name. A roller derby queen, uber cool and always with a smie on her face, this girl brightens my day. She rocks a retro dress like no one else. Briliant at her job, even better at partying.